More Local Bumper Stickers

I found this draft that we never posted. Enjoy - or be disturbed.

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We now keep a log in the car of odd bumper stickers we see. We cannot vouch for their moral or political integrity, but these are honestly so bizarre, we cannot resist sharing more with all of you.

1. I am speeding because I really need to poop (Complete with speedy cartoon poop. Additional note: this was not the typical bumper sticker plastered car - it was the sole declaration the owner felt compelled to apply.)

2. Where are we going? And why am I in a handbasket?

3. Condoms are easier to change than diapers

4. You are living proof that cowboys humped buffalo (This one is beyond our comprehension.)

5. You haven't lived until you've lived with a sheep herder (Why not shepherd?)

6. Stop supporting anti-canine legislation (What?)

7. God is my co-pirate

WAITING by John Burroughs

Serene, I fold my hands and wait,
Nor care for wind, nor tide, nor sea;
I rave no more 'gainst time or fate,
For, lo! my own shall come to me.

I stay my haste, I make delays,
For what avails this eager pace?
I stand amid the eternal ways,
And what is mine shall know my face.

Asleep, awake, by night or day,
The friends I seek are seeking me;
No wind can drive my bark astray,
Nor change the tide of destiny.

What matter if I stand alone?
I wait with joy the coming years;
My heart shall reap where it hath sown,
And garner up it's fruit of tears.

The waters know their own and draw
The brook that springs in yonder height;
So flows the good with equal law
Unto the soul of pure delight.

The stars come nightly to the sky;
The tidal wave unto the sea;
Nor time, nor space, nor deep, nor high,
Can keep my own away from me.



*I really, really miss my husband. Is it too obvious?